Pagliacci - Warped Self Image

I had to complete a conté crayon self portrait sketch in under one hour for one of my advanced drawing classes. The self portrait had to convey to the viewer our self image, and inner hidden feelings. It was supposed to show others what we felt like we looked like on the outside. At the time is was going through a lot and was pretty depressed, so I identified with the crying clown Pagliacci. To the real world, all of my friends, and family I came across as the classic nice guy. I was happy, supportive/caring, funny, fun to be around, social, and seemed well put together. Needless to say I always felt completely transparent like others could see my deep inner secrets, my failures, my bad deeds, my sins, and I felt so exposed all of the time. We all wear masks to help us hide the things that make us most vulnerable I suppose from time to time.